personal trainer

Where does the time go, my friends!  It’s July 1st, 2010.  My desire has been to blog my health journey, which lately has fallen by the waistside. 

I have not stopped my health journey, however I’ve had my struggles the last few months. I’ve been around the same weight for the last 5 months or so.  I’ve lost a total of 105lbs and need to lose 70 more!  I weigh in at 204.  I’ve been between 197 and 223 the last 5 months.  I can’t seem to stay under 200. 

My trainer talks about Desire and Belief.  You have to have both in order for change to happen in your life, no matter what it is.  I’ve had the desire and passion to lose the rest of the weight but have not really believed I can weigh 130lbs.  I haven’t believed I can get the agility back in my knees and the physical fitness to where I can do just about anything when it comes to activity and sports.  Without the belief, the motivation has died even though the desire has been overwhelming. 

Then, when I got comfortable losing 105lbs and comfortable in my new body the desire to lose more was gone!  I get compliments all the time on how good I look now and how desireable I am now. My doctor, friends, family are all very proud of me. I feel fantastic and look good.  The belief came back because of what I’ve already accomplished but the desire to push and do more died. 

Therefore I have been in a “Self-Induced Plateau”.  I read a blog today that helped me realize where I am and the encouragement I got back was tremendous.  It’s a trainer’s blog and she used this expression, which really hit the nail on the head.  It’s been my mental attitude that has kept me from moving forward. 

My trainer believes once I make it through this wall of mental status, get back to the desire with the belief that I can do it and get under the 200 mark….the rest will melt off and I will get to my goal.  He told me on Tuesday that I need to be comfortable with getting uncomfortable.  I need to eat clean, even though I don’t want to.  I need to cleanse, when I don’t want to.  I need to workout, when I don’t want to.  That’s when the success comes in, not when it’s easy. 

Today I’m feeling the desire as well as the belief that I can get to my goal of True Health & Wellness for my life.  I’m definitely uncomfortable today, so I’m in the right place 🙂  I’m on day 2 of a 7 day cleanse.  I worked out on Tuesday with my trainer.  Yesterday I did 50 mins on the treadmill at an 8 incline at 3.5 speed with 4 one minute runs at a 3 incline and 5.3 speed.  Tonight, my best friend is coming over and it’s Competition Thursday.  We’ll do a combo of strength training and cardio for one hour.


I sure have gotten back into the routine of working out!  It’s been killing me, haha!!   I’ve been seeing Dave, my trainer, on a regular basis again – twice a week.  He’s really been kicking my butt!  During this cleanse I have zero inflammation to my knees so he’s having me  do more walk/runs!  My legs are sooo sore.    My rest times between cardio and weights are less now too and he closely watches the time.  Sweat is pouring off by the end of the hour!  I used to get grossed out by all the sweat that literally pours off but now it’s almost like a badge of honor!  Does anyone else feel that way?  In fact sometimes I gauge my workouts by how sweaty I can get. 

I must confess I was a big baby and complainer this week with Dave.  Each time I left dripping in sweat.  My mental status is not in a good place now.  I clearly don’t see the big picture this week.  It plays with my head when I work out doing a lot of cardio and don’t see the results I want on the scale!!!    I can’t believe how much it brought me down yesterday.  This is why I don’t own a scale and am weighed by Dave only.  I’m clearly still unable to use it as just a tool.  It affects my mood in a negative way!  😦

My planned workouts for the next several days looks like this:

Today (Friday) – DAY OFF!!! 

Saturday – 25 mile Bike Ride (all flat)

Sunday – Gym, Treadmill Walk/Runs for 1 hr and some weight training

Monday – Gym, Treadmill Walk/Runs

Tuesday – Workout with Dave

Wedneday – ???

Thursday – Workout with Dave

Well, it’s official!  I’m now a “poster child” for my trainer’s business.  My before and after pics flash first thing.   To see it, click on this link.

Hopefully by the end of the year a third pic will be up.  The last one showing a total of 165 lbs lost!

Until then, I have another 65 pounds to go.  The pressure is ON!  It’s one thing writing an anonymous blog; it’s another to be out there in front of everyone with your name on it!  🙂

I’m ready to tackle this with the help of Dave, my online friends, my close friends, my co-workers and most of all My God!

I had ZERO motivation for doing any cardio last night!!  I was having an emotional day and wanted to curl up in my warm bed upon arriving home from work!!!  That sounded really good to me.  I even posted on my Facebook status, “Warm Bed or Treadmill?”  I loved the responses.  Half said the warm bed and the other half said both with treadmill being first!  🙂

I changed into my workout clothes as soon as I got home.  Then I played around on the computer for almost an hour.  I kept thinking I promised my trainer Dave that I would do cardio on my own 4 times last week and THIS week.  I only did 3 last week.   I need to step up my “on my own” working out again.  I then passed my mirror and saw my ever shrinking belly (that is still there, just smaller) and thought…I have to workout for that to go away.  My routine and motivation for any cardio in the last 3 months have gone down the tubes….completely!! 

I’ve learned that consistency is more important than what you do or how long you do it!  Exercising on a consistent basis forms a habit.   Someday it will not be thought of as a chore but rather a lifestyle.  Most of the time, it’s still a chore at this point.  Sometimes it’s not..YEAH!!!

I got my butt downstairs to the fitness center at my apt complex and got on the treadmill for 40 mins with an incline of 11 at a  speed of 3.2!  I then sat in the sauna room for 25 mins.  I felt better for doing it.  When I got back in it was to bed!  I felt ZERO guilt laying in bed the rest of the evening.  🙂

Sometimes the motivation is just not there.   Sometimes you have to just do it anyway.  Did I feel better after?  Physically, not really but mentally, 100% YES because I did it anyway!  That’s why I’ve lost 100 lbs so far.  Doing it anyway when I DID NOT FEEL LIKE DOING IT!!

What keeps you going when you don’t want to?  What are your stumbling blocks to make this health journey a lifestyle?

 100lbs down and feeling human again! Although I’m still 65lbs away from reaching my goal weight, I feel great and look forward to feeling amazing! I just returned home from visiting family over the holidays. Traveling at a size 14 is a whole new ballgame then it was 4 years ago when I was a size 28. The last time I flew on an airplane was physically and emotionally draining.  I remember the anxiety I felt walking down the aisle looking for my seat.  I could literally see the looks of judgment and thoughts of: “Please don’t sit next to me.” I was embarrassed when I spilled over in my seat, and when I had to ask for a seat belt extension.  Not being able to put the tray table down was unbearable. This time, I’m happy to report no one even paid attention as I walked down the aisle. I had to tighten the seat belt and had plenty of room for the tray table. I even had extra room on my seat! On the last leg home, I had the middle seat and it was no big deal!

Besides feeling healthier and 100lbs lighter, my medical conditions have greatly improved. Let me paint you a picture of where I was just a few years ago: I was 40 yrs old weighing in at 300lbs. I was diagnosed with type two diabetes (proceeded by insulin resistance), polycystic ovarian syndrome, sleep apnea, acute hypertension, high LDL and dangerously low HDL cholesterols, arthritis in both knees and hips, patella femoral pain syndrome, iron deficiency, asthma, in the high risk category for heart attack and stroke and of course morbid obesity. My doctor put me on all kinds of medication. I was taking around 12 pills a day, using a CPAP machine, an inhaler, nasal spray, and had to inject a shot of medication into my stomach twice daily! Can we say “out of control?!”

How did I let myself get to over 300lbs? What happened!? How could I solve this issue for good? I would hear things like: “Just stop eating so much. Eat non-fat foods only. Count calories or points. Eat our food. Ever thought of surgery? All you need is ‘my’ program or video…” You get the picture. I’ve tried it all, except for the surgery. The diet programs would work to lose some weight but I would eventually gain it back plus some. I was never able to stick to an exercise program because it wasn’t for the obese or I would push myself so hard into injury. There was a period of about 6 months I went through physical therapy for my right knee due to using the leg machines incorrectly.

Either way, diet or exercise got me frustrated and as always I would give up. About 3 years ago when I started injecting medicine for my diabetes I began to lose weight. The side effect for using Byetta was loss of appetite, which resulted in weight loss. I lost about 70lbs in 9 months. From there I got into a relationship where I stopped focusing on my health. I wasn’t anywhere near my goal weight but I looked and felt better. Slowly I began to gain weight and before I knew it a year later I gained 55lbs back. Seriously, again?!? TIME OUT! I’m not doing this again, no way, not this time!

What do I have to do to make this a lifetime lifestyle that is natural and not a chore?  Have you ever googled the word healthy? It showed 189,000,000 results. Holy Cow!? How was I going to figure out what was right for me? I needed help and not with just diet and exercise. It became painfully clear I had emotional and mental ties to food and my health in general. I knew I needed knowledgeable guidance and accountability. I decided to Google, ‘personal trainer health and fitness in San Diego’. That’s where I found Tru Health and Wellness. I was intrigued by what I read because it not only talked about exercise and nutrition by metabolic typing but the emotional and mental side of it too. I took a few days to really think and pray about this as I knew this wasn’t in my budget. I finally decided to make my health a priority and invest in me. Besides, how much money was I spending on all the doctor visits, blood work, and medications? I had no idea what to expect and admit I was completely terrified to walk in for my consultation. Did I have too many medical and physical problems, would they understand obesity and all that it comes with are they really going to be able to put an individual program to fit my needs? Yes, beyond my expectations!

This journey has not been without struggles, setbacks and pain (both physical & emotional.) It took a while for me to truly trust my trainer especially when it came to looking at the emotional, mental and spiritual side of this journey. However in order for me to achieve a lifetime lifestyle of true overall health and wellness in all areas I had to face certain aspects of my life. I couldn’t have gotten this far without my trainer guiding and walking through this with me, always being in my corner and never letting me give up. The success so far has been both learning how to not give up during the setbacks, struggles and pain, but also finding new and healthier ways to deal with problems. For the first time I feel confident I will not gain it all back again because the habits I’m forming are becoming natural. On my visit home, a family member asked me if it was ok to eat fries in front of me. I responded with of course it’s ok. I didn’t order the fries because I can’t have them; it was because I didn’t want them. My food choices today are based on what I’m craving and what I want to eat. It just happens to be 90% of the time they are healthy choices now. Eating healthy is finally not a chore.

My medical issues today? Well, my last visit to the doctor showed for the whole year of 2009 my LDL has been below normal range and my HDL is reaching normal, my blood glucose levels have been below the diabetic range (technically I‘m not diabetic anymore), I’m not taking any more shots, my sleep apnea has greatly lessened and will not need my CPAP machine very soon, my knee pains have lessened, I only take about ½ of the medications, and the best news is that in one year I have decreased my risk of heart attack and stroke by almost 60%!

The last two days I’ve been quite ‘achy’, which is normal for the cleanse.  It just means things are moving.  My lower back has had some pain as well.  I’ve been trying to crack my back for relief by bending over at the waist and and letting my arms hang with all my weight there and just let my arms pull down to the ground.  As I relax and just let that happen my spine aligns and I can feel and hear several of the vertebrae crack.  By the way…I HATE that sound of cracking knuckles, bones etc…  My co-worker cracks his neck, which drives me crazy!  Today the cracking was so loud in my back it scared me and I jolted up!

Most of the inflammation in my body is gone.  I still have some around my knees and hips where I have a little arthritis.  I’ve had a few moments when I wanted food and was “hungry” but for the most part, it’s been just fine.  I did say today that I am NOT thirsty anymore and didn’t want to drink my food.  No more headaches either, whoohoo!  I truly believe that my attitude has everything to do with being able to do this and not be grumpy.  My trainer called me earlier to day to check in, see how I was feeling.   I told him that I’m surprisingly doing well this time and since I know it’s for 20 days I better settle in for the ride!  Getting irritated now would make this a VERY long process.

My workout went well today.  I was dripping in sweat most of the time!  I did a lot more cardio in-between sets of push-ups and work with the ball.  My knees are doing pretty good too, thank God!  I have not done any impact exercise since all the most recent knee trouble.  I’ve really been taking it easy on them and this time being ok with it.  I”m growing in that area.  That is, I handled the “step backward” better this time and didn’t beat myself over the head because of it.  I have to say that I didn’t realize that I handled it better until Dave, my trainer, made that observation with me today.  Definitely one of my weaknesses is not being okay when I feel I’m taking a step backward.  It drives me crazy and messes with me emotionally, mentally, physically and spiritually.  I’ve gotten better over the years with ‘progress not perfection’ but certainly have a few areas where perfectionism rears it’s ugly head and stays for a bit!  I’m  glad that I was able to get through this last hurdle faster and with more grace. 

Oh, I’ve lost 6bls so far!  For those of you who’ve been following my blog know that Dave took away my scale and I don’t weight myself any longer.  He does all the weighing and measuring but I don’t get to know what that is, quite yet.  I was shocked that he said, “hey you’ve lost 6lbs so far”, not that I lost 6lbs but that he told me.  🙂  I wasn’t expecting that.   

I had other things to share and now have forgotten. Oh yea, it’s important to make sure you get the sleep you need during this cleanse.  I didn’t get much sleep last night and my energy level was a little worse than I normally would have been.  Therefore, I’m going to bed now to wake up with Day 5 ahead of me!

UPDATE:  Now I remember, I tried my new Tai Chi DVD tonight!  It looks great and I’m going to LOVE it….once I can do it that is!  Hahaha.  I’m literally dyslexic and listening to him give instructions of left and right and back and forward and up and down and then watching knowing it’s the opposite for ME was not so easy!  It’s gonna take some practice for sure.  I didn’t get a workout or anything…just started learning some of the moves. 🙂

I took last week off from seeing my trainer and I’ll be taking this week off too.   My knees and legs are still in Recovery from all the packing and moving.  I’m going to the gym tomorrow to start swimming again.  I’ll use the pull-buoy so I can rest my legs and knees.  My eating this weekend was on and off.   I’ve been using the tennis ball on my muscles and am continuing to ice, rest elevate and use my knee braces.  It’s frustrating to be patient and feel like I’ve taken a huge step backward.  I’m trying so hard not to say “forget it” and completely quit. 

This morning I had fruit and a perfect foods bar for breakfast and 2 1/2 hours later I had a ton of veggies with some blue cheese dipping sauce.  

Work is dwindling and am really feeling the pressure of the contract ending in 4 months! 

My cats and I are adjusting well in the new place with my friend.   We had a great weekend exploring the area and found some great stores we both love, saw a great play on Saturday night, listened to a great message on Sunday at church, organized everything in my new bathroom, had friends over for a BBQ on Monday! 

I’m ready for a new week of great things!

Next Page »